Saturday, May 14, 2011

The Giggle

I finally decided to try acupuncture! However, I didn’t do it for my Parkinson’s disease, but for something mortifyingly embarrassing: I’m terrified of the dentist. I'd heard that acupuncture can do wonders with anxiety control, so I thought I’d give it a shot.

I found an acupuncturist close to where I live by the name of Dr. Du, and in no time at all I was sitting on my scooter in the waiting room of Dr. Du’s office.

When I first entered the small waiting room, there were three very elderly Chinese women who were chitchatting among themselves in Chinese. They were so lovely, because the moment they saw me they switched to English so that I could be included in their conversation. Even though it was difficult to understand them through their thick accents and broken English, I thoroughly enjoyed their company.

I heard one woman ask another, “Why you come see Dr. Du for?” The second woman answered, “Headaches.” The first woman put a hand to her back and added. “I come for bad back.” The third woman stretched her fingers and said, “Tendons hurt.” Then all three women slowly turned their heads towards me with raised eyebrows, waiting for my answer as to why I had come. I could have used my Parkinson’s disease as the reason for my presence, but their sweet faces encouraged me to reveal the embarrassing truth. ”Uh... I’m afraid of the dentist,” I admitted.

The room grew utterly quiet. Crickets began chirping in my ears. They stared blankly at me; their minds calculating my ridiculous, yet truthful answer. Finally, the first woman leaned over, patted my knee, and smiled kindly. She said, “Not to worry. Dr. Du do good work.” However, my immature sense of humor heard her say, “Dr. Doo-Doo good work.”

Hence, I started to giggle.

I’m not just talking about a quick little giggle, this one was one of those uncontrollable, shoulders jiggling, nonstop giggles... gawd, I was so embarrassed. I tried hard to suppress it by covering my mouth, which did nothing for my now watering eyes.

I glanced at the three women and saw that they were looking back at me with sympathetic expressions, and I realized that they thought I was crying, not laughing, which only made me laugh even harder.

The first woman leaned over and patted my knee again saying, “Nothing to fear. Dr. Du do not put needle in mouth.” But again, I heard “Dr. Doo-Doo,” which fueled my out-of-control merriment, tears now streaming down my face. The elderly ladies were so sweet and all three started patting me and handing me tissue after tissue.

Thankfully, I was able to compose myself just as I was called in for my session because I didn’t want to meet Dr. Du as a hysterically giggling, sobbing mess. Just as I turned the key to my scooter, the first woman leaned over one final time and whispered...”For relaxation, have Dr. Du put needle in turd eye.” Turd eye? I thought. Oh! THIRD eye! But that was all she wrote, folks, the final straw: I did meet Dr. Du as a hysterically giggling, sobbing mess.

I highly recommend Dr. Du, she was professional and had a beautiful smile. The needle in my third eye relaxed me so much, that I asked her if she wouldn’t mind cleaning my teeth, too.

Thank you, Dr. Du. A jab well done.

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